'Scarry Night' flash fiction challenge: Insurance

Here's my entry into Patti Abbott's flash fiction challenge. The challenge was to include the line: 'I really don't mind the scars.' My piece is called 'Insurance'.


‘I really don’t mind the scars,’ Julia said, running her middle finger along the caesarean wound, thumbing the stretch marks, ‘it’s the bastard who created them I hate.’ She was sitting on a recliner next to a clear blue pool, wearing a lime green bikini, a large floppy hat, and a pair of sunglasses that seemed to mask half her face.

‘You hate Danny?’ Lisa said from the pool side, her arms resting on the warm concrete, her chin placed on her hands.

‘Danny? I don’t hate Danny. He’s six months old, for god’s sake, Lisa. He eats, pukes, shits, sleeps and giggles. If it wasn’t for the giggles I’d probably hate him, but, well, y’know.’ She took a sip from a tall cocktail glass. ‘Richard. He’s the one I hate.’

‘Richard?’

‘He’s made my life hell.’

‘Richard? You have everything you want, Julia. A nice house, a pool, a BMW, home help. How is your life hell?’

‘You don’t live with him. He’s manipulative. He lies. He hides things from me. And he snores. And now I have him just where I want him. We’re married and I have Danny. The divorce will set me up for life. I can make a fresh start.’

‘You had Danny to trap him?’ Lisa pushed off the side and floated across the pool. She was wearing a plain black all-in-one bathing suit, her long legs tapping the surface, propelling her slowly.

‘You make me sound like a gold digger. Danny was insurance. These scars are the price.’

‘Insurance? Insurance against what?’

‘Him cashing me in short for a younger model.’

‘Jesus, Julia. This is Richard we’re talking about, right?’

‘You don’t know him like I do. He has a dark side. He might seem like he’s a family guy when he meets you, but believe me, he’s a wolf in sheep’s clothing. He’s been having affairs.’

‘Affairs? Are you sure?’

‘Of course I’m sure. A wife has a way of knowing these things. What I need is hard evidence. That’s why I want you to ... to test him.’

‘You want me to ... to have an affair with Richard?’ Lisa swam lazily back to the pool side.

‘No. I want you ... I want you to tempt him. Be photographed with him. Kissing him. Anything past first base.’

‘I don’t know, Julia. I’m ...’

‘You’re my sister, Lisa. You’re perfect for this. What man can’t be tempted by his wife’s younger, single sister?’

* * *

‘She thinks you’re having an affair,’ Lisa said, running a fingernail across Richard’s chest.

Richard chuckled and tangled his fingers in her long hair.

‘She wanted me to set you up. Get some sleazy PI to take photos of us kissing. She intends to take you to the cleaners. A divorce. The works.’

‘She wants what? The little ... bitch.’ He worked his fingers free.

‘Danny is her insurance.’

‘Insurance? He’s our son!’

‘There’s no need to shout. I’m trying to help you here. Let you know what she’s planning. She’s my sister, Richard, and you are having an affair. And I’m not the first. We need to careful is what I’m saying.’

‘Careful? She’s threatening to leave me and take my son!’ He pushed her head off his shoulder and slipped naked from the bed. ‘Insurance? Two can play that game!’

‘Richard? What are you planning? Richard?’

‘Our future,’ he said, pulling on his underpants.

‘Our future? What about Julia? Danny?’

‘Danny will be fine,’ Richard said, tugging on his shirt. ‘He’ll have has aunt. As for Julia, that bitch has it coming. I’ve given her everything. There’s no way she’s taking Danny. It’ll be over my dead body.’

* * *

‘Does it hurt?’ the young man said, tracing his finger along the scar.

They were naked, lying on top of the sheets, the man leaning up over her, studying her form.

‘No, though sometimes I dream that it opens up. That it becomes a gaping wound.’

‘And you don’t mind it?’

‘Why should I? It’s part of who I am. Beauty is in your aura, not some perfect scar free body. Having children; that’s what women do. It’s a mark of life.’

‘I think it’s beautiful.’ He lent down and kissed the scar tissue.

There was a bright flash from the window, quickly followed by another two.

‘What the ...’

The young man was dashing to the balcony, but the photographer was already making good his escape.

* * *

‘Did you get the photos?’ Richard said, blocking out the sun.

‘Did you get mine?’ Julia asked, looking up from the recliner, her glasses slipping down her nose, her brown eyes gazing out over them.

‘You had our bedroom fitted with a secret camera.’

‘You had my sister in our bed, Richard. My sister, for god’s sake. She always was unreliable and impressionable.’

‘I’ll fight you all the way, Julia. It’s worse for the mother to have an affair.’

‘Don’t be an idiot, Richard. We’ve both had affairs. They cancel out the other. Perhaps we should bury the hatchet, so to speak? Take another shot at it? For Danny? We both have our insurance now.’

‘You want to try again?’

‘Why not?’

‘What about Lisa?’

‘Lisa’s off limits. And there can be no others.’

‘And you?’

‘Of course. We’re both on notice.’ She turned over onto her stomach and held out a bottle of sun cream. ‘Can you do my back?’

Lazy Sunday Service

Two endings today. The first, the last government. The final result is still pending as there is still counting going on in some constituencies. As of writing there are 150 out of 166 seats confirmed, with four constituencies still outstanding, two of which are undergoing recounts. Wicklow, which had the largest number of candidates, is on Count 13 with no candidate yet over the quota and elected. Fianna Fail and the Greens have been decimated. Fianna Fail got 78 seats in 2007, the Greens 6. This time round it looks like Fianna Fail will be on c.20, the Greens 0. No party will have a majority, with seats gained by Fine Gael, Labour, Sinn Fein, Independents, and United Left Alliance. Only four cabinet and junior ministers survived. It looks like a Fine Gael/Labour coalition.

The second, I completed the first draft of Good Cop/Bad Cop this morning. It didn't end quite as I expected it to, but that's good. This is the first novel I've planned out in broad terms, making brief notes on all chapters, before drafting. It's taken its own course in writing, but stayed within the general parameters of the overall plot. I've also drafted all the way to the end without stopping to go back over earlier parts to edit and redraft. At the minute I have slightly paradoxical feelings about it: for once I'm happy with the overall story, which makes me a little unnerved. The two main characters are so easy to write for, the book kind of wrote itself. Next stage is a full read through and hopefully I'll still be happy enough. If so, then onto beta readers.

My posts this week
Review of The Vienna Assignment by Olen Steinhauer
Winter's Bone: Book and Movie
Review of Falling Glass by Adrian McKinty
NAMA and Northern Ireland
I loved my mother so much, that I have killed her
Review of Miami Blues by Charles Willeford
A kick in the ballots

A kick in the ballots

It's election time in Ireland. Given a dose of the flu, just about the only thing I managed to do yesterday was vote. The ruling Fianna Fail/Green Party coalition has been given a good kick in the ballots, with their vote collapsing enormously given the economic peril the country finds itself in. Ireland has multi-party constituencies and runs a PR-STV system of election. This means that each constituency returns 3, 4 or 5 TDs to the Dail, depending on its size, and when you vote you rank the candidates in your preferred order. Based on the number of people who voted a quota is set. If a candidate has more than the quota they are elected. In nearly all constituencies, after the first count usually only one candidate is elected and in many cases none are yet elected. For those over the quota the surplus will be redistributed based on who came second on that candidate's ballot papers or the candidates that came last are eliminated and their second preferences redistributed. Depending on the number of candidates and the distribution of votes it can take several rounds for all candidates to be elected. What this means is that is a lot of drama as the transfer of votes plays out over several counts. The count is now well underway and will continue into Sunday. Lots of drama to come. One thing's certain - we'll have a new government in the next week. It'll almost certainly be a coalition between Fine Gael and Labour, unless FG can scrape over the line to form a single party government (it looks like they'll be a few seats short) or Labour decide to let them form a minority government.

Review of Miami Blues by Charles Willeford (No Exit Press, 1984)

Psychotic Freddie Frenger Jr has just got out prison in California. Wanting a new life he mugs three men, takes their money and credit cards and heads to Miami. In the airport he’s approached by a Hari Krishna who won’t take no for answer. Freddie’s solution is to break his middle finger, not expecting the man to die of shock. Sergeant Hoke Moseley is assigned to the case, unsure whether this is an accidental death, manslaughter or murder one. Moseley’s life is in a hole: he’s living in a down-at-heel motel and most of his salary going on alimony payments. In a twist of fate Frenger has hooked up with Susan Waggoner, a simple-minded young woman who is working as a prostitute in a hotel, and happens to be the dead Krishna’s brother. Hoke breaks the news to Susan and Frenger, quickly picking up on the fact that Frenger is an ex-con. Where Hoke sees potential trouble, Frenger sees an opportunity. A gun and a badge will give him free license to get people to do what he wants; and what he wants is for Susan to be his common-in-law wife and for him to prowl the mall and prey on pickpockets and drug dealers. All he needs to do is turnover Hoke and relieve him of his gun, badge and handcuffs. When Hoke wakes up in a hospital with his jaw wired shut, he suspects Frenger, but he’s no evidence. Moreover he’s on sick leave and he’s been told to stay away from duty. But such inconveniences never keep a good cop down.

Miami Blues is the first of four Hoke Moseley novels. It was made into a movie in 1990. In many ways, Willeford was the forerunner for the comic noir set of Sunshine State novels by the likes of Carl Hiaasen, Elmore Leonard, Tim Dorsey, Victor Gischler, Randy Wade White, James Hall, Laurence Shames. The novel was darkly amusing, without being laugh out loud funny and in many ways the novel kind of aimlessly unfolds, lacking in a strong narrative drive. The plot is rather straightforward, and I was expecting a few more twists and turns. Certainly much more could have been done with the resolution. The characterisation is good, with the relationship between Frengler and Susan nicely explored, though Hoke seemed a little underdeveloped. Overall, an enjoyable enough read. I’ve heard that it’s the weakest of the Hoke novels, so I’ll probably give the others a go at some point.

'I loved my mother so much, that I have killed her'

Sometimes a sentence makes you do a double take. As with the quote above written in a war-time diary by a young half-Jewess. It's detailed in Berlin at War: Life and Death in Hitler's Capital, 1939-1945, a fascinating account of the lives of Berliners from all walks of life during the conflict. The quote is from a chapter dealing with the deportation of 55,696 jews from the city between 1st October 1941 and the end of the war in 1945. In addition to this, it is estimated that 10% of those that received deportation notices committed suicide, whilst other sought escape by flight or hiding. In the case of the quote, it was an assisted suicide by poison. From early on in the deportation process rumours were circulating about the fate of those being 're-located' and some decided to take their own or their loved ones lives rather than face a brutal future ending in them having their lives taken through starvation, beatings, shootings and gassings. People and the societies we create never cease to amaze me.

'I loved my mother so much, that I have killed her.' And it was an act of love. What a messed up world.

Patti over at Pattinase has a flash fiction challenge running based on an overheard line: 'I don't really mind the scars.' 'I loved my mother so much, that I have killed her,' would probably produce a set of interesting stories.

Review of Falling Glass by Adrian McKinty (Serpent’s Tail, 2011)

Rachel Coulter, an ex-drug addict, has fled with her two young children. Her ex-husband, Richard Coulter, the multi-millionaire owner of Northern Ireland’s low-cost airline, wants them found and he’s willing to pay a handsome fee. Coulter has turned to fixer Michael Forsythe who recommends Killian, a Pavee Traveller, who specialises in finding people and fixing problems. Having retired and sunk his nest egg into the Northern Ireland property market that has since crashed, Killian is persuaded to take on the case. He soon has Rachel in his sights, but it seems that she has taken more than the children, something that is likely to turn Killian against his employers. And so a second hunter, a former Russian soldier, is sent to edge Killian out of the picture and retrieve the daughters. Thus a deadly cat and mouse chase ensues.

The real strength of an Adrian McKinty book is the quality of the writing. His prose and dialogue are excellent and the stories are well told. Falling Glass is a straight thriller, with a relatively uncomplicated plot lacking in major twists or turns, and a small group of core characters. Killian, Rachel, Coulter and Markov are all interesting characters, but for me they were lacking a little in depth. In contrast, the two young daughters were more ‘alive’ and resonant. The start is excellent and the story is engaging, with some very good scenes in places, but I had difficulty believing both the first escape scene and the final confrontations. Whilst the story is entertaining, to this reader it was not quite as good as his other books I’ve read. I guess this is the problem if you set the bar so damn high. Still good stuff mind, just not quite flying at the same altitude as Dead I May Well Be or Fifty Grand. Overall, a straight up and down thriller, with some very nice prose, that’s an entertaining read.

Winter's Bone: Book and Movie

I reviewed Dan Woodrell's Winter's Bone in 2009. It was one of my reads of the year. At the time I wrote:

Winter’s Bone is a powerful tale, exquisitely told. Woodrell expertly immerses the reader in the rural, clannish society of the Ozarks, creating a multi-textured sense of place populated by authentic familial and social relations. And immersion is the right word; one doesn’t simply read a description of Ree’s world, one is plunged into it, living it with her, experiencing all her anxieties and frustrations. The characterization is excellent and Ree and her close and extended family are full, complex characters which radiate emotional depth and whose interactions and dialogue resonate true. Whilst the story is sombre and bleak, it also has hope, and it quickly hooks the reader in, with the narrative taut and tense, and the prose beautiful and lyrical. Indeed, one of the strengths of Woodrell’s writing is that it is so rich and yet so economical.

I quickly went off and purchased two more of Woodrell's books - The Ones You Do and Tomato Red.

At the weekend I rented Winter's Bone from the local DVD store. I'm a bit wary of watching film adaptations of books I've read because the movie invariably has a weaker narrative or the screenwriter/director has made a vague pastiche of the book changing the storyline in all kinds of ways (see my comparison of the book/movie The Ice Harvest). The film version of Winter's Bone is a pretty faithful adaptation of the book. Even the style of storytelling seems to echo Woodrell's writing style. There was no attempt to jazz the film up with unnecessary violence or shoot-outs or over the top melodrama; this was crime drama with a small c, told in an under-stated, matter of fact way, concentrating on familial networks and social norms, and everyday rural life teetering on the edge. And it was compelling viewing, as the book was compelling reading. The movie has been shortlisted for four Oscars, including best film. Whether it'll manage to compete with the hype of the other contenders, I'm not sure, but I hope it's in the mix. The movie trailer can be watched here.